Popular Jokes
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Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
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In case he got a hole in one!
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What did one plate say to the other plate?
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Dinner’s on me!
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Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
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Because they make up everything!
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What do you call a fish with no eyes?
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Fsh!
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Why did the math book look sad?
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Because it had too many problems!
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What did one pencil say to the other pencil?
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You’re looking sharp!
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What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
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Nacho cheese!
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What did one wall say to the other wall?
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I’ll meet you at the corner!
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Why was the broom late?
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It swept in!
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What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
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Do you smell carrots?
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?
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To get to the other slide!
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What do you call a bear with no teeth?
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A gummy bear!
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What’s a pirate’s favorite letter?
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Arrr! You’d think it’d be R, but it’s actually the C!
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What’s a cat’s favorite color?
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Purrrple!
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Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
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Because it was two-tired!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
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Frostbite!
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Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
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Because it was feeling crumbly!
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What kind of tree fits in your hand?
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A palm tree!
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What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
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Nothing, they just waved!
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What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
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A carrot!
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Knock Knock Jokes
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Justin.
Justin who?
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Just in time for some funny jokes!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cow says.
Cow says who?
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No silly, cow says moo!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Boo.
Boo who?
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Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
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Lettuce in, it’s cold out here!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
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Olive you and I miss you!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Wood.
Wood who?
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Wood you like to hear another joke?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
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Dewey have to keep telling knock-knock jokes?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Harry.
Harry who?
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Harry up and open the door!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Honeydew.
Honeydew who?
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Honeydew you want to hear another joke?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
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Orange you glad I didn’t say banana again?